If you’re someone concerned about global warming, I’ve got good news. You know all those millions of three-wheeled jalopies spewing plumes of black smoke into the air each day? Zillions of them? Throughout Asia? Pouring millions of tons of carbon into the atmosphere. You can stop worrying!
I bought an e-bike!
What I’m trying to say is this: I’ve saved the earth.
With the rise in the earth’s temperature, and concern about the future of our planet, you might have already guessed the main reason I bought an e-bike. And that reason is, of course-
After researching e-bikes for months, I learned a lot. First off, there are three basic categories of electric bikes:
“Category 1” e-bikes. These bikes require that you pedal, but they help you pedal with a feature creatively called, “pedal assist.”
“Category 2” e-bikes. These bikes, like Category 1 e-bikes, can help you with “pedal assist.” However, they also have a throttle! These bikes can zip you along at up to 20 miles per hour without your feet ever touching the pedals! So, if you’re a wise e-bike consumer, and by wise, I mean lazy, you can just twist the throttle and off you go!
Finally, the “Category 3” e-bike. These bikes also have a throttle, and they can speed you along up to 28 miles per hour. But sadly, most jurisdictions require that you have a license and insurance to ride them. AND, you can’t ride them on the bike paths.
So, if you’re too lazy to pedal, and you also happen to be cheap, the Category 2 e-bike is the one for you. That’s my Category 2 e-bike in the picture. It’s a Lectric bike. No, that’s not a typo. The company just left the “e” off the word electric and named their company “Lectric.” Their creative team must have spent the better part of three seconds coming up with that marketing gem.
So, if you see me zipping along the bike paths of the greater Eugene, Oregon area, feel free to give me a wave and thank me. Remember, I saved the planet.
One thought on “If You’re Alarmed By The Millions Of Tons Of Carbon Released Every Day In India and China By All Those Smoke Spewing Jalopies, Relax, I Just Bought An E-Bike”
Jack, I don’t see any rear-view mirror. Now that you’ve solved the preventable heart attack problem, and the world climate change issue, you still have to watch out for that distracted driver texting who is coming up behind you.
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