If I may speak seriously for a moment, I need to make one thing clear.  I stand on principle, and there is one principle on which I will not compromise.  Here it is:  Even if it only saves one life, implementing every safeguard to prevent the spread of Covid-19 is critical during this pivotal moment in our nation’s history, even if it means we must endure skyrocketing teenage suicide rates and ignoring those so-called “necessary” cancer screenings.  In short, “we must follow the science,” even if it kills us. 

Walmart hasn’t remained open because it’s a multibillion-dollar powerhouse.  It’s simply safer to wait in line at Walmart than other stores.  (And much, much safer than election lines.)

States haven’t allowed liquor stores to remain open because they rake in zillions in tax revenue.  It’s SAFER to wait in line at liquor stores. 

Airlines haven’t continued to pack travelers into airtight tubes for hours on end because of their political clout.  (You wacky conspiracy theorist!)  Study after study has proven that sitting for five hours shoulder to shoulder with smelly strangers is perfectly safe.  Remember, these airlines are “following the science.”  So, feel free to take a flight.  Climb aboard, sit back, take a deep breath and relax. 

None of these activities is, for example, the insanity of visiting a hair salon.  Or something totally bonkers, like attending a funeral.  And don’t get me started about all those maniacs who want to go to church!  These raving lunatics will kill us all!

Anyway, that’s my take on it.  On the other hand, I might just be a better person than you.  In fact, if you don’t feel the same way, maybe it’s time for you to take a good long look in the mirror.  But please, for the sake of all that is true and pure, when you take that look in the mirror, PLEASE remember to follow the science and wear a mask.