This McDonald’s is Located in Fantasy Land

This is NOT a “hit job” on McDonald’s.  Okay, it is a hit job on McDonald’s.  However, in my defense, McDonald’s drew first blood.

To fully understand this column, you must have seen that commercial where the young McDonald’s employee shows up at McDonald’s and tells his manger that he has received his college acceptance letter.  Until this point, everything is normal.  It’s a McDonald’s.  All hell is breaking loose.  People are at the counter, a vehicle is waiting at the drive thru window.  An employee with a headset is manning the drive thru window.  Cooks are flipping burger patties.  It’s a busy McDonald’s operating at a minimum of DEFCON 3.

This is when the commercial enters a bizarre time-space bending wormhole.  The manager snatches the letter from the employee and yells, “Everybody!  Two seconds!”  The employees immediately snap from their workstations and form a circle.  The manager then reads the letter, and they enthusiastically applaud.  Here is a still from the commercial showing their unbridled jubilation-

When I walk down the street, people probably eye my “robust” physique and think to themselves, ‘I bet that guy know his way around a McDonald’s menu.’  Those people would be correct. But I doubt that I am the only soul, among my loyal readers, who enjoys “dining” at McDonald’s.  I’m not saying I’m an expert, but I’ve got a lot of McDonald’s experience under my belt (sadly).

Can you, even for a moment, even for a micro-nanosecond, imagine a McDonald’s manager calling his employees off their stations, as they busily keep the bags of McNuggets streaming over the counter and through the drive thru window, having them form a circle, and then reading a letter to the assembled crowd?

Let’s picture how this scenario would play out in the real world.  The line at the counter stacks up as those toward the front wonder where everyone disappeared.  The drive thru line comes to a sudden halt, and cars start piling up filling the drive thru lane.  The guy in his car by the ordering speaker starts yelling for someone’s attention.  The cars begin backing up into the parking lot blocking traffic.  The burgers which are STILL COOKING ON THE GRILL begin overcooking and smoke starts filling the kitchen.

It would be PURE, UNADULTERATED, CHAOS.

And that, my friends, is why you will only find this McDonald’s in Fantasy Land.

_____________________

WAIT!  You’re not done yet!  Please comment and share.  Example of a recent  encouraging comment: “This blog would be great if it were funny.  Try to make it funny next time.”

Click here on Jocularious.com to access Facebook, Twitter and other “share” buttons. Earn good karma!

Subscribe!

It’s free and easy, and each new Jocularious column will arrive in your inbox.

It’s a Three Minute Vacation for your Brain.

______________________________

Also-

Check out these great books:

The Lawyer’s Song: Navigating the legal wilderness at –

https://buff.ly/2K41Tax

Seven Rules for the College Playground –

https://buff.ly/2IqXxgn

Seven Secrets You Need to Know to Hire the Right Lawyer –

https://buff.ly/2roFIov