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Tag: Shopping humor

Just Because A Store Is Open 24 Hours Does NOT Mean You Should Shop At 4 AM

The fact that the parking lot was a barren landscape was the first sign that I should have abandoned my plan to shop and immediately made my escape. Nevertheless, like the stupid teenager in the horror film who goes down into the basement to investigate where all the blood and screaming is coming from, I […]

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Attention Shoppers: Prior to Driving Away, Please Remove Your Grocery Bag From the Roof of Your Car

No, I didn’t make it all the way home with my grocery bag on top of my car, but I darn well gave it my best!  I am many things, but I AM NOT A QUITTER! When I got home, I put the bag back on top to memorialize my stupidity for posterity, and, of […]

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Nothing Says Buying in Bulk Like Watching a Kid Sneeze Directly into the Bin

My sister-in-law recently told me she liked to buy grocery items in bulk. You know – pasta, flour, rice, et cetera – from those big bins.  I told her that those bulk bins were dangerous because members of the “general public” had direct access.  It simply wasn’t sanitary.  I asked her why she was wasting […]

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