{"id":926,"date":"2017-02-02T06:42:30","date_gmt":"2017-02-02T14:42:30","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/jocularious.com\/?p=926"},"modified":"2017-02-10T12:54:49","modified_gmt":"2017-02-10T20:54:49","slug":"can-save-endangered-creature","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/?p=926","title":{"rendered":"Only You Can Save this Endangered Creature!"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a>By Jack Edwards
\n<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u00a0Our world is rapidly changing.\u00a0 Mankind\u2019s behavior is wreaking havoc on our planet.\u00a0 Time is of the essence, and we must act NOW.\u00a0 Among our challenges is to save one of our humble creatures whose very existence teeters on the brink of extinction.\u00a0 I am speaking, of course, about the \u201cthank you wave,\u201d that little over the shoulder wave we give to drivers who let us merge in front of them.<\/p>\n

The population of thank you waves was once abundant in North America.\u00a0 Herds of them roamed freely over the Great Plains as far as the eye could see.\u00a0 Wait, those were bison (or were they buffalo?)\u00a0 Anyway, as with the bison (or buffalo), we took the thank you wave for granted.\u00a0 And now, although there are \u201cthank you wave deniers\u201d yapping away on talk radio, the thank you wave stands on the precipice of complete obliteration.<\/p>\n

President Trump even referred to this crisis during his inaugural address.\u00a0 I quote: \u201cThe day of drivers allowing others to cut in front of them without reciprocating with a thank you wave, IS OVER!\u00a0 Big league!\u201d<\/p>\n

I let people cut in front of me all the time on my morning commute, and the last thank you wave I got was on Christmas Eve back in 1994.\u00a0 Although even then, I wasn’t certain if he was just making a quick adjustment to his rear-view mirror.<\/p>\n

I think I can speak for every American, when I say that the thank you wave is a creature we want to survive for our children, and our children\u2019s children, and our children’s children children, and our children’s children children children.\u00a0 But\u00a0 no longer; it really should end there.<\/p>\n

Ironically, there is one wave which we can all agree should be totally eradicated.\u00a0 A wave that has been nothing but a blight on the face the earth: The sports stadium \u201cWave.\u201d\u00a0 This wave should have died a natural death along with streaking in the 1970s, but it somehow managed to hang around like a nasty case of scabies.<\/p>\n

With your help, we can save the thank you wave.\u00a0 Just like we did with the buffalo.\u00a0 Unfortunately, we can\u2019t use the same plan we did with the buffalo.\u00a0 That plan worked like a charm.\u00a0 Remember the old adage, if you want to save an animal from extinction, just get the American public to start eating it.\u00a0 We now have more bison roaming around our country than the common fruit fly.\u00a0 But sadly, unlike with the buffalo, we can\u2019t simply adjust our palates to enjoy the lean, healthy taste of a thank you wave.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

By Jack Edwards \u00a0Our world is rapidly changing.\u00a0 Mankind\u2019s behavior is wreaking havoc on our planet.\u00a0 Time is of the essence, and we must act NOW.\u00a0 Among our challenges is to save one of our humble creatures whose very existence teeters on the brink of extinction.\u00a0 I am speaking, of course, about the \u201cthank you […]<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":true,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[2],"tags":[555,556,566,554,562,564,563,557,553,552,532,560,565,558],"class_list":["post-926","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-humor","tag-bison","tag-buffalo","tag-courtesy","tag-donld-trump","tag-drive","tag-driver","tag-driving","tag-endangered","tag-extinct","tag-extinction","tag-humor","tag-merge","tag-merging","tag-thank-you-wave"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_likes_enabled":false,"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/926","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=926"}],"version-history":[{"count":12,"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/926\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":945,"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/926\/revisions\/945"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=926"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=926"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=926"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}