{"id":3172,"date":"2023-06-17T06:26:08","date_gmt":"2023-06-17T13:26:08","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/jocularious.com\/?p=3172"},"modified":"2023-06-18T17:31:39","modified_gmt":"2023-06-19T00:31:39","slug":"i-would-love-to-watch-my-new-smart-tv-but-im-not-smart-enough","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/?p=3172","title":{"rendered":"I Would Love to Watch My New “Smart TV,” But, Unfortunately, I’m Not That Smart"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
\"\"<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

I had the same TV for 20 years, but recently, family members started complaining.  They said the sound didn\u2019t work.  I told them the sound DID work, you just had to do the following: <\/p>\n\n\n\n

1. Turn the TV on.  <\/p>\n\n\n\n

2. Turn the TV off.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

3. Wait eight\nseconds, until you hear a \u201cclick\u201d sound.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

4. Turn the TV on a second time. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Voila!  Picture AND sound! <\/p>\n\n\n\n

They also complained that it wasn\u2019t a \u201csmart TV,\u201d i.e., it didn\u2019t get any of their fancy \u201cstreaming\u201d channels.  <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Truth be told, the major obstacle I had with getting a new television was the thought of getting rid of the old Sony.  That thing was heavier than a Buick Skylark.  I bought it just about the time my youngest daughter was born, and she just graduated from college.  Way back when men were men, and TVs were, well, super heavy TVs.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So, I fired up my old 2002 Tacoma and headed off to Costco.  I immediately fell in love with an 86-inch model.  It was perfect!  Unfortunately, I made the mistake of taking my wife with me.  She said, \u201cno.\u201d  She explained that given the size of our family room, if we got an 86-inch TV, we\u2019d feel like we were sitting in the front row of a movie theatre.  <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I buried my\nsadness in a $1.50 hot dog.  <\/p>\n\n\n\n

We finally settled on a 65-inch model and hauled our high-tech trophy back to the house.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Then came the dreaded task\u2026 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Two hernias later, I had successfully hauled my perfectly good old TV to the dump.  It was an emotional moment.  We had shared many precious memories.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Back at the\nhouse, I got the new television out of its box and secured it to the pedestal. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

This is when\nthe REAL problem reared its ugly head. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

When I bought this TV, I made a big mistake.  I accidentally forgot that I didn\u2019t have a Ph.D. in Computer Science.  I really only watch cable news and the Food Network, both of which worked perfectly well on my old Buick\u2026, I mean, old Sony. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

At long\nlast, with the aid of a YouTube video, my wife, and the Holy Spirit, I managed\nto navigate to the cable news channels.  Now,\nif I can just shake the habit of turning it on, turning it off, waiting eight\nseconds until I hear a click, and then turning it on again.  Oh, the memories. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I had the same TV for 20 years, but recently, family members started complaining.  They said the sound didn\u2019t work.  I told them the sound DID work, you just had to do the following: 1. Turn the TV on.  2. Turn the TV off. 3. Wait eight seconds, until you hear a \u201cclick\u201d sound. 4. […]<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":3179,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[2],"tags":[1085,1086],"class_list":["post-3172","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-humor","tag-new-tv","tag-tv-humor"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/jocularious.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/06\/Vintage-TV.jpeg?fit=483%2C405&ssl=1","jetpack_likes_enabled":false,"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3172","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3172"}],"version-history":[{"count":18,"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3172\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3195,"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3172\/revisions\/3195"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/3179"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3172"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3172"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3172"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}