{"id":3059,"date":"2022-10-16T10:44:46","date_gmt":"2022-10-16T17:44:46","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/jocularious.com\/?p=3059"},"modified":"2022-10-16T10:44:48","modified_gmt":"2022-10-16T17:44:48","slug":"scientists-announce-amazing-new-diet-called-stop-eating-like-a-pig","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/?p=3059","title":{"rendered":"Scientists Announce Amazing New Diet Called: “Stop eating like a pig!”"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
\"\"<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

After a new \u201cdouble-blind\u201d study, scientists have announced that\ntheir \u201ccontrol group\u201d of individuals who did not \u201ceat like a pig,\u201d lost\nsignificantly greater weight than the, \u201cate like a pig\u201d group (who actually\ngained 7% over the three-month study).<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This announcement has already sparked intense controversy in\nthe food industry.  Scientists from\nNabisco, Kellogg\u2019s, Dunkin\u2019 Donuts and Cinnabon have sharply criticized the study\u2019s\nmethodology.  Specially, they questioned why\nthe study took 12 years to complete.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The study\u2019s scientists have acknowledged that the delay in conducting the study may raise questions, but they explained that they ran into difficultly finding study participants.\u00a0 While they found no difficulty finding volunteers willing to \u201ceat like a pig”.\u00a0 They struggled to find sufficient participants willing to forgo \u201ceating like a pig,\u201d for the three-month study period.\u00a0 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

In full humor-journalist disclosure, the author of the article, me – Jack Edwards, might be biased in reporting this study.\u00a0 I have been strictly adhering to the \u201ceat like a pig\u201d diet for years, and now, only after my careful analysis of the underlying data from this shocking study, am I asking myself whether I\u2019ve been gravely mistaken.\u00a0 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Let\u2019s just say, it’s a real \u201cwake-up\u201d call.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

However, because my role as a humor journalist is no laughing matter (sadly), I have decided to reserve my final opinion on this study. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

And it\u2019s a good thing, too!\u00a0 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Nabisco, in conjunction with Cinnabon, just announced their own, \u201ceat like a pig\u201d study.\u00a0 They\u2019ve even hired a Harvard trained nutritionist (who had, coincidently, been on the brink of personal bankruptcy) to lead the effort.\u00a0 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

They have already started signing up volunteers.\u00a0 So far, I am very impressed with their transparency and professionalism.\u00a0 They have agreed to let me act as an \u201cembedded\u201d journalist in one of the two study groups. They even let me pick which one. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

So, I\u2019ll see you in three months!\u00a0 (And when I return, you might just find me 7% funnier!)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

After a new \u201cdouble-blind\u201d study, scientists have announced that their \u201ccontrol group\u201d of individuals who did not \u201ceat like a pig,\u201d lost significantly greater weight than the, \u201cate like a pig\u201d group (who actually gained 7% over the three-month study). This announcement has already sparked intense controversy in the food industry.  Scientists from Nabisco, Kellogg\u2019s, […]<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":3060,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[2],"tags":[1070,1072],"class_list":["post-3059","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-humor","tag-dieting-humor","tag-pig-humor"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/jocularious.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/10\/J-Pig.jpeg?fit=1527%2C1280&ssl=1","jetpack_likes_enabled":false,"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3059","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3059"}],"version-history":[{"count":18,"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3059\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3078,"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3059\/revisions\/3078"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/3060"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3059"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3059"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3059"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}