{"id":251,"date":"2014-01-23T06:43:40","date_gmt":"2014-01-23T14:43:40","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/jocularious.com\/?p=251"},"modified":"2018-05-08T20:33:31","modified_gmt":"2018-05-09T03:33:31","slug":"unofficial-yukon-quest-insiders-guide","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/?p=251","title":{"rendered":"Unofficial Yukon Quest Insider’s Guide"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Quest<\/a><\/b><\/p>\n

By Jack Edwards<\/b><\/p>\n

I think I speak for everyone, when I say that there are few things in life I enjoy more than watching people suffer.\u00a0 This is why I am so excited that the Yukon Quest begins in just nine days.\u00a0 What is the Yukon Quest?\u00a0 Think NASCAR, except dog sleds for cars. \u00a0\u00a0Watching people suffer at room temperature is one thing, but watching them suffer in subfreezing conditions? \u00a0Well, that\u2019s a whole new level of toe curling, \u201cThank goodness I\u2019m not that guy,\u201d satisfaction.<\/p>\n

The Yukon Quest is a 1,000 mile dog sled race between Whitehorse, Yukon, and the Alaskan city named after screen legend Douglas Fairbanks.\u00a0 The Yukon Quest\u2019s official motto is: \u201cThe Iditarod is for sissies!\u201d\u00a0 The starting point of the race alternates between the two cities.\u00a0 The rules require that the last musher to begin the race neatly fold and then tuck the starting banner into his sled.\u00a0 According to one race official, \u201cSure the last musher usually gripes about it.\u00a0 But this saves us a bundle in postage getting ready for next year\u2019s race.\u201d<\/p>\n

This year\u2019s \u201cinsider tip\u201d:<\/p>\n

Be on the lookout for Lance Mackey.\u00a0 (Lance Mackey is the Peyton Manning of sled dog racing.)\u00a0 Mackey isn\u2019t signed up this year, yet<\/i>, but here is an insider rumor<\/i>.\u00a0 Mackey has stolen one of Amazon\u2019s prototype drones and hatched a diabolical plan.\u00a0 He\u2019s going to use his \u201cstar power\u201d and golden boy charm to convince race organizers to let him sign up for the race at the last minute.\u00a0 Then he\u2019s going to attach his GPS sled tracker to the pilfered drone.\u00a0 After that, it\u2019s off to Honolulu for ten days before zipping back to slip onto the trail again and claim the prize.\u00a0 If you see Brent Sass, Hugh Neff or Allen Moore gazing up into the sky as their sleds fly along the course, it means that the rumor is out.\u00a0 They\u2019re looking for Mackey\u2019s drone.<\/p>\n

Bonus \u201cinsider tip\u201d:<\/p>\n

Any of you who are interested in signing up for next year\u2019s race can find the entry requirements on the Yukon Quest official website.\u00a0 The requirements are: 1. You must be at least 18 years old, 2. You much have completed a 200 and a 300 mile race, and 3. You must sign a sworn statement that you will not attach your GPS transponder to an Amazon drone.<\/p>\n

Bonus, bonus \u201cinsider tip\u201d:<\/p>\n

Rumor has it that next year\u2019s Yukon Quest will be sponsored by Amazon.<\/p>\n

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______________________________<\/strong><\/p>\n

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Seven Secrets You Need to Know to Hire the Right Lawyer –<\/strong><\/p>\n

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\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

By Jack Edwards I think I speak for everyone, when I say that there are few things in life I enjoy more than watching people suffer.\u00a0 This is why I am so excited that the Yukon Quest begins in just nine days.\u00a0 What is the Yukon Quest?\u00a0 Think NASCAR, except dog sleds for cars. \u00a0\u00a0Watching […]<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":true,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[2],"tags":[196,147,194,197,148,195,192,188,198,189,190,187],"class_list":["post-251","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-humor","tag-allen-moore","tag-amazon","tag-brent-sass","tag-dog-sled","tag-drone","tag-hugh-neff","tag-lance-mackey","tag-nascar","tag-sled-dog","tag-whitehorse","tag-yukon","tag-yukon-quest"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_likes_enabled":false,"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/251","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=251"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/251\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1285,"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/251\/revisions\/1285"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=251"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=251"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=251"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}