{"id":1349,"date":"2018-06-30T09:46:57","date_gmt":"2018-06-30T16:46:57","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/jocularious.com\/?p=1349"},"modified":"2018-07-03T11:13:30","modified_gmt":"2018-07-03T18:13:30","slug":"secret-enjoying-free-disney-world-vacation","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/?p=1349","title":{"rendered":"How to Enjoy the Disney World Experience for Free"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

I asked my daughter if she was enjoying her Disney World vacation as we inched forward in line.\u00a0 \u201cDad,\u201d she groaned, \u201cWe\u2019re in Safeway.\u201d\u00a0 \u201cA line\u2019s a line,\u201d I replied, \u201cand they say getting there’s half the fun.”<\/p>\n

Enjoying a Disney vacation from the comfort and convenience of your local grocery store doesn\u2019t \u201ctechnically\u201d allow you to experience a ride at the end of the line, but it\u2019s many other advantages greatly outweigh this minor difference.<\/p>\n

Let\u2019s start with cost.\u00a0 A one day pass to the Magic Kingdom is $126.74 for an adult and $120.35 for a child.\u00a0 A one day pass to Safeway World is the danger of accidentally buying a quart of Chunky Monkey ice cream and then accidentally falling head-first into it and scarfing down the whole thing down.<\/p>\n

Parking at Disney World costs $22 if you want to park in their lot conveniently located one town over, or $45 dollars if you want to park close enough to visit the park that day.\u00a0 Parking at Safeway World remains complementary, but as they are now requiring us to scan and bag our own items, please enjoy the free parking while it lasts.<\/p>\n

A 16 ounce Coke at Safeway World is $1.89.\u00a0 A small drink at Disney World is half your 401K.\u00a0 (Oh yeah, I forgot to mention that included <\/em>in the $126.74 is the privilege, as an official Magic Kingdom \u201cguest,\u201d of leveraging your home equity toward the purchase of a mildly warm soft pretzel. On the up side, they throw in the mustard packets for free<\/em> \u2013 Hey, Disney Executives aren\u2019t animals!<\/p>\n

Safeway World offers many other advantages \u2013<\/p>\n

It\u2019s temperature controlled.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s just down the street from your house.<\/p>\n

Every once in a while someone is handing out free cheese samples.\u00a0 (Try finding that at Disney World.)<\/p>\n

In complete fairness, I must admit that Disney World and Safeway World tie in the screaming baby department.\u00a0 But Disney wins hands down in the disappointed seven-year-old\u2019s, \u201cI\u2019ve been waiting all year for this, and it\u2019s not the overwhelmingly joyful experience I imagined,\u201d category.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m sure some of you vacation \u201cpurists\u201d will nitpick the differences between Disney World and Safeway World, but I urge the rest of you to seriously consider taking your family to Safeway World this summer instead of the Magic Kingdom.\u00a0 If the kids complain, offer to park half a mile away from the store to make it feel more like an authentic Disney experience.<\/p>\n

\ud83d\ude42<\/p>\n

WAIT! \u00a0You\u2019re not done yet.\u00a0 Earn good karma!\u00a0 Please comment and share on Facebook, Twitter or your other favorite apps.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

Subscribe!\u00a0 <\/em><\/strong>It\u2019s free and easy, and each new Jocularious column will arrive in your inbox.\u00a0 It\u2019s a Three Minute Vacation for your Brain<\/em>.<\/p>\n

______________________________<\/strong><\/p>\n

Also-<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

Check out these great books:<\/p>\n

The Lawyer\u2019s Song: Navigating the legal wilderness<\/em><\/strong> at \u2013<\/p>\n

https:\/\/buff.ly\/2K41Tax<\/p>\n

Seven Rules for the College Playground –<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

https:\/\/buff.ly\/2IqXxgn<\/p>\n

Seven Secrets You Need to Know to Hire the Right Lawyer –<\/strong><\/p>\n

https:\/\/buff.ly\/2roFIov<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I asked my daughter if she was enjoying her Disney World vacation as we inched forward in line.\u00a0 \u201cDad,\u201d she groaned, \u201cWe\u2019re in Safeway.\u201d\u00a0 \u201cA line\u2019s a line,\u201d I replied, \u201cand they say getting there’s half the fun.” Enjoying a Disney vacation from the comfort and convenience of your local grocery store doesn\u2019t \u201ctechnically\u201d allow […]<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":true,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[2],"tags":[5,705,706,707],"class_list":["post-1349","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-humor","tag-disney","tag-disney-world","tag-safeway","tag-safeway-world"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_likes_enabled":false,"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1349","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1349"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1349\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1356,"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1349\/revisions\/1356"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1349"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1349"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jocularious.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1349"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}